White Tiger’s Lair

There are a number of things I have been wanting to blog about for a while but I have just been too busy, that and the fact that thoughts are still running around in my head and have not actually congealed yet. Many times I have so many different thoughts running around in my head I can not concentrate on any one thing and the result is I end up getting nothing at all done. The only solution I have thus far come up with is to make 1 thing of such high priority that nothing else matters until that one thing is done. Ok enough about how i deal with the random thoughts in my head, here is more about the thoughts themselves.

In no particular order a few of the things that occupy my thoughts these days:

□ Volunteer Project 1: This one is gong well, has recently started and is off to a good start, my main thought is how to make it more useful. It is important but so far on a somewhat local scale.

□ Volunteer project 2: This one is big and business related, just made it past official approval procedures, now I have to learn how to pull a major even together and have it all working by Sept 20th the date of our first event.

□ Job search, always on my mind, but does not always get the attention it deserves. This is a major problem in two respects, first I have no money but a lot of debt and second if I don’t find something in the next 2-3 months I am going to have to leave Germany I really have no place to go from here.

□ The Future: I have wanted to start my own company for some time now. I have a few ideas for some niche companies but I feel i don’t yet have the expertise i need nor the contacts. I know that i need to work in renewables for a few more years before making any moves. The related part of this “future” situation the latest crazy idea that i just cant seem to get out my head. I love the renewables energy industry, there are always new developments (both in terms of technology and the business aspects). The more i learn the more detail i want to understand, and that is where i run into a little problem in that i dont have and engineering background, so much of “how things work” i understand only the basics and i want more. This lead me to thinking of going back to school (yes again).

Stanford has a really interesting program for a Masters of Engineering in Energy Engineering (sorry i am writing this post on the train so no links right now) and then continue with a Phd looking at risk management particularly in connection with risk management of project financing for renewable energy projects. I am just starting to think about this and if i ever were to do it, it would require a several years planning and preparation first. For one thing it would require about 100k more in student loans (on top of the 120k i already owe and cant pay). Secondly, with an MBA and an engineering degree from Stanford as well as a Phd i would be completely unemployable. At that point I would have to start my own company because i would for all intents and purposed be out of common “salary” range. At the same time i really want to understand this stuff, to me it is very very interesting and come on, how cool would it be to have and engineering masters from Stanford too!!

So right now i am spending my time learning as much as i can about the related subjects and brushing up on physics and chemistry when what i should be doing is focusing on becoming completely fluent in German so i can get a job and stay here.

Why stay here???

Hmm well that is a very good question and one that is not so easy to answer. Yes, it is much harder for me to find a job here due the language, work permit and the general bias against hiring women of child bearing age in Germany because of the 3 years per child maternity leave. Once i do find a position the pay is considerably less then in the US, i am expecting 25-35% less plus the taxes are higher. On the other hand, health insurance is cheaper for me here, and there is a standard for 6 weeks vacation plus holidays and sick time (even as and intern on a 6 month contract I get 10 days vacation). And more than that is just quality of life here, i share a nice flat, nothing special but certainly not a dump and the room and all utilities including broadband internet cost me 280 a month only 20 min U-bahn ride from Stadtmitte. Here i go to large bier gardens with co-workers after work and can go walking around lakes or through gardens on weekends. There is so much history and things are so close together, i have been hiking in the alps several times now since it is only a 2 hour drive from my friend’s house. Next weekend i am thinking of taking the 2 hour train ride to Prague and in late September we are trying for a 5 day hiking tour of Transylvania in Romania… this is a lifestyle that i just don’t thing you can have in the US. The whole outlook is different.

And of course there are people here i do not want to leave. I did not want to leave people in the US either but this is somewhat different as I am here now, not there.

So what to do? Well for the time being I am looking for a job anywhere and everywhere in the world, at this point my career must take first priority, and i am hoping the rest will kind of fall into place.